kind of a joke. But I like it. HBU?

I think if someone tried to paint my life
It would be a waste of paints
It would end up an impossible mess
And abstract of something
That’s barely real as it is
Or maybe more like a Pollack
With splashes of color
On the blacks and grays
Or an oceans full of waves
Lapping against the beach at sunset
Or would it be sunrise?
Well… I’m pretty young
so it would probably be sunrise

If someone were to draw my life
It would be a waste of charcoal
But I guess there are a lot of shadows
Which could be fun to do with charcoal
But black isn’t enough for me
Just that and grays and whites
I need some color in this portrait
To brighten up my life.

If someone where to dance my life
I think we’d need African drums…
Yeah we’d definitely need African drums
I guess I’m just that bad ass
And the dancer would have to flip and turn
Be more of a gymnast I suppose
Cause my life gets pretty crazy
Sometimes…
I guess I’m starting to run out of rhymes

And if someone were to eat my life
Oh what a dish it would be!
I guess maybe a layered casserole
Or maybe a fruit cake or some pasta
or one of the soups that’s served all cold?
But anyway back to the point
It would probably pretty flavorful
And no it would NOT keep for leftovers
Probably wouldn’t even taste that good the first time
Cause I do spicy and I do sweet
And those two together…
uhh…
it’d probably taste like feet
But this whole verse is kinda weird anyways
Cause who talks about life as a casserole?

But if someone were to sing my life
Now there would be a fit!
It would be new
It would be fresh
The lyrics full of wit
It would ebb and it would flow
With ease that’s beyond me
The perfect melody
If only I could write my life
Put it down in verse
Then I could decide were it went
And who would harmony
But things don’t happen that way
What kind of life would that be?
If I could write myself a happy ending
What future could I possibly see?

Landis
1/5/09

December Inspiration!!! GASP!!!

So yeah basically this is the reason I live, for quirky genius like this

Short and Sweet: (hope you like it)

I'm naked
I'm numb
I'm stupid
I'm staying
And if Cupid's got a gun,
then he's shootin'
Lights black
Heads bang
You're my drug
We live it
You're drunk, you need it
Real love, I'll give it
So we're bound to linger on
We drink the fatal drop
Then love until we bleed
Then fall apart in parts

Isn't she just awesome!!! ohh
Her name is Ana and she has an everything blog that I LOVE:
http://snazzyfashion.blogspot.com/

and was recently featured on Teenvogue.com, apparently.
CHECK IT!

Underused

Love is the drug
She never even tried
Coursing through her system
She pretends to be alive

Pounding in her eardrums
Another love song plays
The only thing she ever dreamed
Every single day

Help will not come quickly
It might not come at all
If only things could just be like
They were when she was small

This drug will be the death of her
As she lies there on the floor
Once she's done imagining,
She'll only beg for more

Her heart starts beating quicker
With every single breath
She'll feel the most real kind of pain
That won't leave her 'til death

It's a simple kind of torture
With every book she reads
They say you can't get what you want
But this is what she needs

So as she slowly melts away
Backed up against the wall,
At least she has the sense to know
That this is her downfall

-Kara

Sonnet For a Rose

Oh so sad you look, poor wilting flower,
so much has changed since you first bloomed.
From when you were picked for my bower,
Rose, you were most assuredly doomed.

Now your blossoms wilt with the time to drop,
Your stem curving in its watery grave.
If your life must end and your beauty must stop,
Can any of us ever hope to be saved?

So I will lay you on the ground to die,
On that very spot that was your spring birth.
Winter's snow will cover you where you lie,
And return you back to your mother earth.

Spring will come with the slow change of season,
in my garden your pretty kin will bloom.
Their sight and smell will again be pleasing,
but deep in my heart I will always know;

Just as surely as this great earth does tilt,
That my life, as you did, will one day wilt.

Landis
11/16/08

As I Walked Out One Evening

Wellllll here is my (Kara) favourite poem, pretty much, and it really inspires me and I always try to write stuff as good as it but, obviously, I don't.
It's by W.H. Auden

As I walked out one evening,
Walking down Bristol Street,
The crowds upon the pavement
Were fields of harvest wheat.

And down by the brimming river
I heard a lover sing
Under an arch of the railway:
'Love has no ending.

'I'll love you, dear, I'll love you
Till China and Africa meet,
And the river jumps over the mountain
And the salmon sing in the street,

'I'll love you till the ocean
Is folded and hung up to dry
And the seven stars go squawking
Like geese about the sky.

'The years shall run like rabbits,
For in my arms I hold
The Flower of the Ages,
And the first love of the world.

'But all the clocks in the city
Began to whirr and chime:
'O let not Time deceive you,
You cannot conquer Time.

'In the burrows of the Nightmare
Where Justice naked is,
Time watches from the shadow
And coughs when you would kiss.

'In headaches and in worry
Vaguely life leaks away,
And Time will have his fancy
To-morrow or to-day.

'Into many a green valley
Drifts the appalling snow; T
ime breaks the threaded dances
And the diver's brilliant bow.

'O plunge your hands in water,
Plunge them in up to the wrist;
Stare, stare in the basin
And wonder what you've missed.

'The glacier knocks in the cupboard,
The desert sighs in the bed,
And the crack in the tea-cup opens
A lane to the land of the dead.

'Where the beggars raffle the banknotes
And the Giant is enchanting to Jack,
And the Lily-white Boy is a Roarer,
And Jill goes down on her back. '

O look, look in the mirror
O look in your distress:
Life remains a blessing
Although you cannot bless.

'O stand, stand at the window
As the tears scald and start;
You shall love your crooked neighbour
With your crooked heart.'

It was late, late in the evening,
The lovers they were gone;
The clocks had ceased their chiming,
And the deep river ran on.

Thanks for all the support guys:(

oops sorry I forgot to do the inspiring poems thing for october!! :( so I'll post it now and november's!
So actually these two months have something in common. All the insperational pieces are songs and they are both by joni mitchell :)

Circle game

Yesterday a child came out to wonder
Caught a dragonfly inside a jar
Fearful when the sky was full of thunder
And tearful at the falling of a star
Then the child moved ten times round the seasons
Skated over ten clear frozen streams
Words like, when youre older, must appease him
And promises of someday make his dreams
And the seasons they go round and round
And the painted ponies go up and dawn
Were captive on the carousel of time
We cant return we con only look behind
From where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game.
Sixteen springs and sixteen summers gone now
Cartwheels turn to car wheels thru the town
And they tell him,Take your time, it wont be long now
Till you drag your feet to slow the circles down
And the seasons they go round and round
And the painted ponies go up and dawn
Were captive on the carousel of time
We cant return we can only look behind
From where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game
So the years spin by and now the boy is twenty
Though his dreams have lost some grandeur Coming true
Therell be new dreams, maybe better dreams and plenty
Before the last revolving year is through.
And the seasons they go round and round
And the painted ponies go up and down
Were captive on the carousel of time
We cant return, we can only look behind
From where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game

and...

Both Sides Now

Rows and floes of angel hair
And ice cream castles in the air
And feather canyons evrywhere
Ive looked at clouds that way
But now they only block the sun
They rain and snow on evryone
So many things I would have done
But clouds got in my way
Ive looked at clouds from both sides now
From up and down, and still somehow
Its cloud illusions I recall
I really dont know clouds at all
Moons and junes and ferris wheels
The dizzy dancing way you fee
lAs evry fairy tale comes real
Ive looked at love that way
But now its just another show
You leave em laughing when you go
And if you care, dont let them know
Dont give yourself away
Ive looked at love from both sides now
From give and take, and still somehow
Its loves illusions I recall
I really dont know love at all
Tears and fears and feeling proud
To say I love you right out loud
Dreams and schemes and circus crowds
Ive looked at life that way
But now old friends are acting strange
They shake their heads, they say Ive changed
Well somethings lost, but somethings gained
In living evry day
Ive looked at life from both sides now
From win and lose and still somehow
Its lifes illusions I recall
I really dont know life at all
Ive looked at life from both sides now
From up and down, and still somehow
Its lifes illusions I recall
I really dont know life at all



So yeah I would really appreciate if CERTAIN OTHER PEOPLE MAY OR MAY NOT CO-AUTHOR THIS SITE WOULD POST THEIR INSPIRATIONS. That would be nice.

P.S. oh and I do appreciate the poem alisha. You know I always love to hear about your bodily functions. Oh wait... NO. But I still liked it.:)

For Landis

Pee is dripping out of me
Like rain falling gently to the ground

(Just something I cooked up while on the toilet one afternoon)

How to be dead alive (this may be changed, I don't really like it.)

You tell me to stop raising my voice
It's not like I want too
You just don't give me the choice
You never listened to anything I said
I may as well talk to the walls
There's such injustice in your phone calls
I'm first on your list
but you don't care about me at all
You never really got me
no one ever fully will
I don't cry over the milk
but merely the fact that I spilled
I love people who
aren't any good
No one comforts me
when I'm down
I'm too strong
but I wish that they would
But it's not about me
so just take it easy
it's not your fault
So I'll tell you the truth:
you never knew my secrets
it was all another ruse
another play
on the chessboard of life
But what I never knew
is that you played me too
So now I'm standing on thin ice
watching my friends fall through the cracks
And the smiles in my memory
like old photographs
seem more and more unreal
and of all the things for me to feel
I feel depressed
And the Irony of it all
is that if you'd ever been able to catch me
I would have never begun to fall.

Landis
10/17/08

"Please listen to me baby, it is all down to drugs. Atleast I remeber taking them and not alot else"

Since I'm all about breaking the rules...

I'm going to post my photography that inspired this poem. Why the hell not?

Catching Light

it slipped through his fingers

and now a year later

the feeling still lingers

He was my friend

but we lost it all

from different worlds

yet we both would fall

How could the light

be so unkind

as to slip thourgh our fingers

and stay in our minds

The girl in the window

shattered mirror
shattered truth
shattered lies
shattered youth

broken heart
broken light
broken feelings
broken sight

trodden hope
trodden path
trodden frown
trodden laugh

sunken eyes
sunken dreams
sunken hopes
or so it seems

-Landis.

So Far Gone

Open up the Window
Let the world see those eyes
The ones that saw nothing
And tilt them towards the skies.
But in the heart of darkness
You've seen everything
Just when life is silent
The birds begin to sing.
The tune pounds through your eardrums
Forcing you awake
Everything comes back so clear
You'll shiver, scream, and shake.
Tears will trickle downwards
Just so you can know
Why it is you can't be heard
Last chance before you go.
Swing right through the curtains
As that cold wind whips your face
Impelling you to realize
You need a faster pace.
Oh lift up you head, child
Let rain mix with your tears
Then march down the dirt road
Empty of your fears.
There’s no chance to suffer
For your vision comes up black
But even if it feels right,
Don’t try looking back.

-Kara

Something new, to change it up

Ok Landis here and I vote we switch up the system here on thepainwillease and start something new. I think it would be a marvelous idea too, each month, put up a poem or song that has inspired us in our writing. I'll start with this, my favorite poem of all time called The Day Faith Died by and unknown author from the late 1800's :

She made a little shadow-hidden grave,
The day faith died;
Therein she laid it, heard the clod’s sick fall,
And smiled aside-
“If less I ask,” tear-blind she mocked, “I may
Be less denied.”
She set a rose to blossom in her hair,
The day faith died-
“Now glad,” she said, “and free at last, I go,
And life is wide.”
But through long nights she stared into the dark,
And knew she lied.

So now you all have a little insight on what inspires me. Hope it was an illuminating experience :)

Help

Silence playing
Darkness staying
Kids harassing
Sunshine passing
Corpses living
Beggars giving
Summer leaving
Hopeless grieving
Laughter wanting
Daydreams haunting
Peace sign shooting
Rich men looting
Dreamers leading
Beauty bleeding
Outlaws saving
Foes behaving
Children drinking
World shrinking
Scraped wrists lying
Pleasure dying.

-Kara, who is starting to write a lot of poetry again so will be posting on this thing a lot soon

Sunrise

Sunrise Sunrise

looks like music to my eyes

the first breath of day

and the last of night

Sunrise Sunrise

paint the open skies

chase away the darkness

with your welcoming light

Sunrise Sunrise

make me feel alive

breath life into my frame

and help me win this fight

Sunrise Sunrise

you take away the lies

and reveal the worlds beauty

that was hidden from our sight

Sunrise Sunrise

can't take no more surprise

just say the words

and I'll follow you in flight

Sunrise Sunrise

As the world slowly dies

your the last thing I cant count on

You'll always be alright

Thank you, Allison

Dear Allison,

Whether you know this or not you were a major influence on my life and an inspiration. You changed my perception and made me see the world as simply as you do. You reminded me that people aren't one dimensional, a lesson I treasure greatly. Really thank you. Oh and you brought me all the things you found that were shiny or pretty so that was an extrea bonus. I can't think of a better way to explain you than this: A note you left me in my little book of poems that you loved to read. You called the book my soul. This was all the advice I'll ever need.



Life, by Allison Wang



See

A square

A circle

An obtuse triangle

An infinite number

Of shapes.



Smell

the air of a new spring day

a chick

a cub

a new animal

is born.



Hear

the deaths of many

a shriek

a screech

a SCREAM

Silence.



But feel,

Alive.

A common love story that is completely unique

A single meeting

the gaze was fleeting

sparked a light

for us to fight

That first time

was so sublime 

to the hollow 

that followed

Everything was perfect

our hearts still erect

In the field of snow and ice

that would lead us slowly to demise

But of course we didn't know

And hand in hand at fence post row.

We shared that magic kiss

for both of us a first

so things progressed 

as they must

and time and distance between us was thrust

That last night on the brink

I see it when I blink

Our hearts were ringing

our bodies singing

as we danced

away romance

into decay

The stars stole you away

but our love was their to stay

growing more and more each day

until it died

And time isn't healing a single thing

just playing with my heart

taking away all feeling

And the way you smile

it's getting old

But i'm sure you've been told

already.

And my heart is still a flutter

when I stutter 

out a simple greeting.

The worst bit.

In this real tight fit

is that I know for a fact

despite my own silly pact

is the events that have happened here 

will happen again

soon I fear.

Landis

9/9/08

The Last Waltz

Sick inside

She'd been smiling for so long

she could no longer hide

Her eyes were dead

she couldn't sleep

she couldn't get out of bed

the ceiling had been her screen

on which she watched her life

fighting back a scream

never trusted

She had been played

Broken and busted

it'd been ages

since she'd been really honest

confined to her cages

she started getting dizzy

dancing with death??

Such waltzing was not easy

But she kept twirling 

for them

jumping and skipping and curling

But the dance was coming to an end

with her final dip she clung to then

but no longer could she pretend

they had gone

into the black

she could not go on

could not look back

Landis 8/8/08

Close Encounters of the Real Kind

So you think there’s things I got to do
Things that are my duty to me
I’m so sick and so fucking tired
Of hearing how things are “supposed” to be
Sure my life’s one fucked up mess
Who hasn’t noticed by now
And everyone’s telling me how to fix it
But the truth is they don’t even know how
Pretty soon people start to go away
They leave me to my tears
They walk away without a care
And leave me with my fears
They leave me with my problems
They leave me with their guns
They think they’re helping me
But they’re the worst fucking ones
There’s the ones who say shit about me
The ones who poison my life
I just say fuck them
But it still cuts deep like a knife
I say that I don’t fucking care
Even though the truth is that I do
I just can’t seem to make myself
Act up to the truth
Yeah I’m having problems
And yeah I want them gone
But trouble’s always here to stay
Though happy goes and comes
I don’t want your sympathy
It’s an empty jar
You act as though you’re sorry
But pity doesn’t go far
You think I want all you’re advice
But I know what to do
But I’m sure as hell not doing it
And neither will you
All your talk is what it is
Worthless jabber to make you feel good
You think you’re doing so much
Ha, doubt you ever could
People like me aren’t worth your time
We know this, so should you
We don’t even care what you say
Words are never true
So what if I have given up
So what if I die
No one misses people like me
And I won’t even cry
But for now I’m just fed up
I don’t want to go anymore
I’m done trying to make things rhyme
They never have before
I compare my life to poetry
Scripted like a play
Maybe that’s why I love the theatre
So I can wash thoughts away
The music’s just a shadow
That I can hide inside
The theatre’s just a house
In which I can hide
And if I strip those away from me
I’m only dry bones
Nothing special hidden
Deep inside you groan
You wasted all your time
For something empty like a book
They don’t hold fucking answeres
But you convince yourself to look
So when will you stop trying
To find meaning in your life
Put away your distractions
And stab me with that knife
Cause I alone have realized
The real meaning of life
And there is none
Life is a mistake
We were never meant to be here
Never meant to ramble on
About how suckish our lives are
While never making sense of our direction
So this poem I’ve written
Holds meaning only to me
It rambles on an on
Like how mistaken life was never meant to be

Twisted

I'm severely depressed 

and I don't think they know

cause it doesn't really show

I'm hiding

hiding from life

to cover up the strife

inside

Inside is a mess

of pain and distress

it's hard to breathe

harder to smile

I need to rest for awhile 

alone

I'm always alone

separated to the bone

surrounded by others

but now they left me

bleeding the left me

to die alone

to die

what a lie

dying is to easy

easy to link

torturing to think

I'm twisted

Freeze the frame

Afternoons wasted

beneath the sky
humming tunes
forget the lies

beneath that tree
time slows
so the sun can burn
and the winds can blow

thoughts spin out
into time and space
the camera raised
to the face

captured
or at least tried
to freeze that moment
for all of time 

Landis